Say what you mean, otherwise, shut it!

I guess you might be confused with the title, you are wondering where I am going on this topic. Well, friends, let me ask you a question. Have you talked to someone in church or at work that they are very bad at communicating with people? Let me be more concrete. Did you realize that the person didn’t want to talk to you while you were ready to have a conversation?  The person just went through the motion, giving you a weak handshake without looking at your straight in the eyes. At the back of your mind, you were thinking: what’s heck! What’s up with that?!

Well, last Sunday, I was in church. Our church had fewer people, owing to the youth retreat. We had extra minutes to kill. The pastor encouraged us to get up and greet each other. I was very thrilled to meet the people behind me. while I was ready to shake their hands, one of the lady just ” symbolically” shook my hands without looking at me.  Immediately, I lost the passion for talking to them. She looked away while shaking my hands. And didn’t bother to listen to what I was about to say or ask. At that moment, I thought about one of the books I read before called “Unchristian” by David Kinnanman. In this book, Kinnanman used very simple and precise way to talk about the issues which Christians are facing today. Also, the reason why majority of the unbelievers have no desire to associate with the believers. Because we are ” fake.” Come to think of the lady I met in church last week. She might be one of them.

I am not even judging her. All I am saying is ” if you don’t mean what you say. Just shut it! Please don’t hurt other people’s feelings.” Think of it, what’s the most challenging thing to do when you try to communicate with a person? For me, that ought to be quick enough to come up with a topic. Please don’t misunderstand me. I am a people person. I love talking to people. However, when I try to open up a conversation with others from time to time, it is really hard to talk to the people sometimes. They have no life. They are not interested in talking at all. That’s where I learn my lessons over the years. You might be familiar with the old saying ,” if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.” well, I dare to re-phrase it a little bit. ” If you don’t mean the stuff you say, just shut it!”

I don’t know if you know it or not, talking to people is a great thing. While we talk, we listen, we grow, we exchange ideas, that’s why the friendship or relationship  has the opportunity to grow. Let’s not take our talking for granted. When we talk to people, look at them straight in the eyes before saying stuff. So, they know ” we mean it!”

I have heard of an old saying  while I was in class. ” Some people talk in their sleep. Lecturer talk while others sleep.” 3831652004_Looking_into_the_eye_answer_2_xlarge

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